My Achilles Tendon Injury

The Story:

It has been my intention to heal. As part of that healing, I had expressed the desire to work on the issue of abandonment, on all levels. Shortly after stating my intention, DK showed up in one of my meditations. He proposed, or wanted to work on abandonment in relationship to God. It didn't happen in that immediate meditation, but the intention to work on the issue was established.

I was playing racquetball one wintery day. I hadn't warmed up fully. Eager to play and have some fun, I picked up a game. Playing casually I hit the ball deep into the corner. As I moved to return my opponent’s shot, I fell. I thought my opponent had run into me knocking me down. It felt like someone had hit me hard in the calf. I crawled off the floor to investigate the possibilities of the injury.

Well, I couldn’t walk, I couldn’t bear any weight on my left leg. I could hardly flex my foot, and when I did, it hurt. I hobbled to the men’s room, got dressed and headed for home. That was the beginning of a most unpleasant experience. I had torn my Achilles tendon.

At the moment of my injury I had just pushed off my left leg at a leisurely rate and was surprised to find myself on the floor. I knew I hadn’t done anything physically to warrant such an injury. Why did this happen? There were no conscious choices on my part to manifest this event, and there was no physical strain that would cause such an injury.

It is not easy to discover the underlying beliefs, that which is causal, of an outward manifested event. You develop cancer, you get into an accident, you are caught up in a natural disaster, what is the relationship between our beliefs and these events? It seems like accidents just happen, and bad things happen to good people.

In addition, there is that new age thought of finding the gift in any tragic event. What is the gift, lesson, and opportunity spirit is offering us from such circumstances? When one is injured, such thinking feels like nonsense. Spirit has got it all messed up. This so called mirroring process is out of control. Tell a person who is dying of cancer that they are creating the cancer. Tell anyone in the midst of suffering that they are creating their suffering and it is a gift. It usually does not help to say the least.

We have our sciences which say earthquakes, disease, and other disasters are a part of nature. They happen for very specific scientific reasons. The plague isn’t the wrath of God punishing us for our evil ways. It is a disease carried by rats, and it was made worse through humanity’s misguided superstitions about black cats. Tragedies are not the personal vendetta of forgotten gods.

What is the truth? We have three possible scenarios:

1. New Age Spiritual: Life is a conscious creation. Thoughts and emotions go out from our being and interact with matter, time, and space in such a way that the events which occur in our life mirror our psyche.

Solution: learn the principles by which events are manifested.

2. Religions: There are conscious forces, gods, more powerful than us who reign down their dissatisfaction with humanity as personal and collective disaster. Solution: go back to sacrifice and invoking the gods to act in our behalf.

3. Science: It is a random chance universe and shit happens.

Solution: buy more insurance and hope we are lucky.

The average person probably does a bit of all three, hoping to create some security in their life... hoping to control the events which comprise their life to being happy meaningful experiences.

With certain types of events, it is easy to trace the cause and effect. If I rob a bank and I get caught, I can look back and see the choices/cause(s) I made that landed me in jail/effect. If a river over flows due to extreme rains, it is easy to see the cause and effect. The difficulty occurs when we can’t link our behavior to the outer event.

As an example: one minute you are walking down the street on your way to work, and all of a sudden you have a wall of bricks falling on you. There was an earthquake. Which of the following scripts accurately represents what happened?

1. This person’s life was in such desperate shape that the only way to make a change was to hit them over the head with a brick.

2. It was an act of punishment or karma. God was displeased with them, or they had done something bad in a past life.

3. It was an act of nature and they are just in the wrong place at the wrong time. A bad day. Life’s a bitch, and then you die.

If we do create our reality through our beliefs, then what do these kind of disasters teach us? Do they teach us to trust spirit? Do they teach us that God has a clue to what is going on here? Who is running this mad house when such things can seem to happen for no apparent reason? I’m not just talking about an incident here and there, everyone throughout all of time has many examples of meaningless suffering that seems to have occurred for absolutely no reason.

What if by some miracle the universe did not evolve by chance and isn’t insane. One obvious argument which supports the idea that there isn’t Divine Intelligence is humanity. For if there is a God who created us, who’s intelligence and power is reflected in the beauty of nature and the vastness of the solar system and beyond, why has humanity experienced so much suffering, poverty, and destruction throughout our history? Why wouldn’t such an intelligent, and supposedly loving, God provide a better blue print for humanity?

Humanity has come up with a lot of theories to answer this question. Humanity is still being punished because an ancestor ate an apple that they weren’t suppose to eat. Not very intellectually satisfying. Humanity has free will and can do anything they want and God doesn’t intervene with our choices; an adolescents heaven. God doesn’t exist, we are the only ones here. What you see, is what you get. Not very emotionally satisfying.

Not exactly comforting. Either humanity is the victim of someone else's actions and is still being punished; or humanity is suffering from divine neglect; or everyone dies and suffers. Get over it. What is the truth?

When we think of Truth we wish for unity. An answer that answers our big questions; an answer which embraces humanity’s suffering as well as humanity’s potential. A single simple Truth that we can understand, apply to our lives and live by, and have a predictable outcome. Follow these commandments and you’ll be saved. Follow this path and you’ll be released from suffering and illusion. Follow this path and you’ll become enlightened.

I don’t know if the numbers of saved and enlightened individuals is increasing from following these mandates. It seems like one makes it every millennium or so. Not very good odds for over six billion people on the planet. Lets see, six billion times one thousand means it will take another six trillions years for humanity to get its act together if there is zero population growth. How long is the sun supposed to last?

It seems like Truth is a little more elusive, a little more complicated, and a little more allowing of everybody and their individual perspective, truths.

So what about my Achilles tendon? My intention was to get exercise, to have some fun and meet some people. I wasn’t out to get in shape to do someone or something harm. I wasn’t even participating in a dangerous sport. If events follow a process of manifestation which on some level is related to our beliefs and emotions, then what are those beliefs and emotions which lead to my injury?

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