I think The Eye of Argon is what happens if you give a non-English-speaking twelve-year-old a thesaurus and a stack of old "Conan" reruns. The sad thing is, I bet a lot more people will read this than anything I'll ever write (thanks to Mike for unearthing these gems for the rest of us).

OW. I hurt. I made it to yoga yesterday, finally. I saw a flyer for a nearby yoga studio on a telephone pole a few weeks ago, and it turns out the place is brand new. I was the only person in my class, but thankfully this was not the fault of the very capable and kind instructor, Cathy. She led me through a thorough series of mostly familiar poses, making sure I was properly aligned and remembered to breathe once in a while. Anyone out there who thinks that yoga isn't a workout just because you're not pounding your legs into the floor or your fists into the air has never done it properly. At the end my whole body felt like over-cooked spaghetti, and this morning I was so sore I could hardly move. I can't wait to go back!

The DVD player arrived (fanfare). Which means that not only will I never get a job, I probably will stop blogging altogether and become one with my easy chair. OK, no, I do have more self-discipline than that. Sort of. For my Panasonic's inaugural rental, I picked up Moulin Rouge as part of my quest to see as many of the Oscar^TM nominees as I can.

The verdict? Wonderful film! I really enjoyed it. I wasn't sure I would, because the fans who are the most worshipful of Moulin Rouge also seem to be die-hard devotees of stage musicals. I'm sort of iffy on stage musicals -- I find the majority of them to be too formulaic and emotionally manipulative. In other words, they always make me cry even though I know I'm watching cheesy garbage (e.g. Aida, Rent). Anyway, I loved Baz Luhrmann's approach of embracing the artifice and theatricality, and turning the traditional musical melodrama into a cinematic spectacle. It's Luhrmann's films (including Romeo + Juliet) that remind us that movies don't have to be naturalistic. The medium of film is open to such possibility that it's fairly remarkable that more filmmakers don't take advantage of that. Besides Luhrmann's two latest films (I never saw Strictly Ballroom), one of the only other recent films that comes to mind in terms of unique storytelling style is Run Lola Run. Much of Moulin Rouge has the heightened reality of 42nd Street on acid, but Luhrmann also knows when to pull back to concentrate on the story and the wonderful performances of the actors themselves--often in beatifully-lit close-ups.

I also love that much of the visual spectacle relies on "old-fashioned" methods of filmmaking like enormous sets, detailed models and matte paintings, rather than excessive CG work. In the DVD commentary Luhrmann points out that modern movie-goers are used to seeing things so letter-perfect on screen because most so-called "flaws" can now be corrected digitally. However, he notes that this tendency toward computer-generated "perfection" can strip the work of its humanity. Indeed, The Phantom Menace looks cold and austere in comparison--not to mention that Ewan McGregor is way hotter in Moulin Rouge.

Nicole Kidman's character Satine is so defined by her beauty that Nicole would hardly need to do much but stand there in her lovely costumes to make an impact. To be fair, though, she did a nice job conveying Satine's various emotional and physical states (though only in a musical would someone complete a complicated singing and dancing performance flawlessly, then drop dead a minute later). She really did look like she was smitten with Ewan McGregor--but who wouldn't be? Especially when her android dwarf of a husband was canoodling with Penelope Cruz at the time. Anyway! I couldn't say if I'd choose her as best actress of the year without seeing some of the the other contenders, but she made solid choices, if not particularly revolutionary ones.

And, yes, it's a crime that Baz Luhrmann wasn't nominated for Best Director.

So, at this point I've seen four of the five Oscar^TM nominees for Best Picture and--all apologies to Gosford Park--I think Moulin Rouge edges it by a nose if I were voting. I still think A Beautiful Mind will win, precisely because it appears to be the least deserving of them all.

It seems there's been a lot of typing going on lately about blogging--why people do it, why they shouldn't do it, why they should go get a job and stop boring us with their mundane lives, etc. Naturally a lot of these discussions/arguments/essays are being posted to blogs--a comment on a comment on a comment. I've largely avoided it because I'm a relative newcomer to blogging myself, and I fully admit it is nothing but pure self-indulgence. Like there's something wrong with that! I'd rather focus on indulging myself than reading other people trying to justify their motives. I have plenty of thoughts about why I'm doing this, but it really all sifts down to: I consider you fully capable of deciding what you want to spend your time reading.

But I do agree that blogs are best when there's something new to be found in them. This can take many wildly varied forms. I found one guy who seems to spend most of his time scanning odd pictures and posting them to his blog. Personally, I would far rather read someone recounting what they had for lunch than pore through an endless list of recyled links. However, I've found some truly wonderful articles and websites by following recommendations of fellow bloggers, so you can't rule it out completely.

This is all leading to the point that I have nothing new for you today, but I found this truly lovely quote on Tom Tomorrow's blog:

Perhaps you have better things to do than read Blogs all day, but if you're bored with my CD collection or Mike hasn't updated his, or JD is complaining about work again (kiddin, love ya), you could do worse than to see what's up with RuPaul. His review of "A Beautiful Mind" (Feb. 18) is hilarious, much meaner than mine.

Happy Purim (belated)!

And just in case this wasn't forwarded to you already, an amusing story (thanks, Alex!). It makes wine-in-a-box seem almost classy: