X-Rated First Date
c 4/96 by Gary J. Ehrlich
Tune: "A Chat With Your Mom" by Peter and Lou Berryman

Why Agent Fox Mulder has no romantic life.  At least, not with any human beings

	Dm	C	Bb	A7
There are psychics with their crystal balls and readers with their tarot
	Dm	C	Bb	A7
Who will tell you what your future is for just a minor fee
	Gm	Dm	C	Dm
With their heads wrapped in bandannas and their eerie way of speaking
	Dm	Dm	C	Dm
It's with them that you can talk about your X-Files not with me!

	D	A	D	A
CH:	We sit down to have a chat
	D	A	D	A
	It's X-Files this and X-Files that
	GA	DA	D	A
	I know those are the cases that you get assigned by Skinner
	DA	DA	DA	A
	But I don't want to hear about the X-Files over dinner!

There are creatures in the sewer eating rats and alligators
Who may also dine on workers from the water company
Spawning flukes and rabid kitties, or perhaps some Ninja Turtles
It's with them that you can talk about your X-Files not with me!

There are MP's at Wright-Patterson who know where Building "Q" is
And who in Washington is in on the conspiracies
And in which missile silo is the UFO wreck hidden
It's with them that you can talk about your X-Files not with me!

Now your partner is a lovely redhead, smart and strong and witty
Who clearly cares about you, or are you too spaced to see?
I can tell she wants to jump your bones and have your alien love child
So it's with her you should talk about your X-Files not with me!