Bye-Bye Barney
or: Let's Send Barney to Jurassic Park

You see him on your TV; the kids all think he's neat
While the adults want to vomit at his songs so sickly sweet
Our children have been brainwashed; our eyes begin to glaze
Oh, where have all the Flinstones gone? I long for Bedrock days

But there exists an isle where he will fit in fine
And if we're real lucky on him something big will dine

     Let's send Barney to Jurassic Park
     Let's see him try to escape
     Let's see Barney fight a real T. Rex
     Let's see Barney smashed like a grape

We'll drop him in the paddock, then turn the power down
And watch a T. Rex lunch on him and throw his limbs around
Or maybe he'll be captured by velociraptors
To the kitchen they will take him; into beef he will be ground

But if he pulls off an escape and doesn't muss his hair
We'll have to kidnap Baby Bop; bring in Baby Sinclair

     CHORUS

While all the children love him; they think that he's a dear
I would rather see him end up as a bloody purple smear
When he starts his singing, the kids are tickled pink
I would really like to send him where he'll soon become extinct

Where he may be an entree or else he'll just die of fright
To watch this purple freak's demise will sure be dino-mite!

     CHORUS